Why silent auctions are evil.

So when Jordan's employer is removing floor samples or has stock that can not be sold anymore, they allow the employees to bid on it at a silent auction.

For reasons I have yet to understand, that Jordan doesn't understand, heck that NO ONE seems to understand, Jordan decided to bid on doorknobs. 21 door knobs. 21 unmatching doorknobs. I dont even have 21 doors. I do however now have 22 doorknobs. For the last couple of days, I have been calling Jordan #22.

Now, I admit wholeheartedly the fact that they are very nice, good quality doorknobs. I even admit that he got a great deal. But the fact remains that I do not NEED these doorknobs.

On the surface, some might even say "Well, lots of women buy several pairs of black shoes/pants/skirts". This may be true, however I submit that at least these women likely WEAR their several pairs of shoes/pants/skirts.

This is the kind of thing that could spark an intense battle between a husband and wife. So what did I do when Jordan told me that he had successfully bid on 21 doorknobs?

I blinked. I blinked. I blinked again. Then I turned away and went to work. I would be mad at him if I could just stop laughing. I keep thinking this is like a Seinfeld episode. Can't you just picture Kramer coming home with 21 doorknobs? I evne said to him later that afternoon after he called to tell me that he had picked them up, "Dont let the fact that I am laughing at you betray the fact that I am actually upset with you"

WHAT THE HECK AM I SUPPOSED TO DO WITH TWENTY-ONE DOORKNOBS?

Jordan has placed them for sale on facebook. So go take a look if you are interested. He bought a rug too. It is a very nive, high quality, so soft under your feet rug. But it just doesnt match my decor. Sigh.

At least I get to keep the windchimes. I am serious. He wont on a shopping spree.

So if you see a tall man stading on the street, saying "psst...wanna by a doorknob?" Don't panic, he is obviously crazy, but completely harmless.

Jes